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Agenda Bender
 
Thursday, April 10, 2003  

On the Other Hand


Good joke from popbitch:

All the Saddam Hussain lookalikes were in
a meeting yesterday. Saddam's doctor came in
and said "I have good news and bad news.

"The good news is that Saddam survived those
American bombs. The bad news, however, is
that he's lost an arm."



Good idea from AgendaBender:

Somebody should Photoshop Saddam Hussein into David Bowie's Aladdin Sane album cover. Why? Well, uhm, it might be a little funny. To a few people. Myself among them. I'd do it myself but I've already spent hours Photoshopping the lyrics:

Who'll love Saddam Hussein
Battle cries and champagne just in time for sunrise
Who'll love Saddam Hussein

Motor sensational, Paris or maybe hell - I'm waiting
Clutches of sad remains
Waits for Saddam Hussein - you'll make it

Who'll love Saddam Hussein
Millions weep a fountain, just in case of sunrise
Who'll love Saddam Hussein

4:57 AM

Wednesday, April 09, 2003
 

Not Good at This


(still whispering) This shutting up for the day thing is a hard concept to wrap my mind around. Perhaps the organizers of the Day of Silence should have played more to gay strengths and named the protest Talk-Even-More-Than-Usual Day.

James Kirchick, a gay Yale student with a column in the school paper, couldn't manage to shut-up for the day either:

The problem at hand represents a far greater conflict not just within the gay community, but other minority communities as well; that is, the enforcement of political conformity. In many circles, whether they be civic, political or even personal, it is expected that if you are gay (or a person of color), you must be liberal. The tired and inappropriate victimization language used by gay and black political movements has excluded many people over the past few decades. For example, the charter of Yale's LGBT Cooperative states, "Because we believe that all systems of oppression are interdependent, we understand ourselves as a part of greater social justice movements."

Which "greater social justice movements" is the Co-op referring to? Using such vague language allows the Co-op to engage in causes that have nothing to do with the fight for gay equality
.

The U.S. Court of Appeals for the 9th Circuit slyly took a different tack to preserve the sacredness of the day. They released a unanimous opinion yesterday, Day of Silence eve, that earns for them the luxury of being quiet today:

The U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled on Tuesday that schools failing to protect gay students from harassment could be in violation of federal law.

In addition, the court went so far as to warn school administrators that they could be held personally responsible if they ignored pleas of help from students regarding sexual orientation harassment.


9:46 PM

 

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!


You're supposed to shut up today in support of gay school kids (LGBT youth in the soulless jargon). OK, I'm in.

(whispering) Planetout has some interesting details on the event. The Eagle Forum thinks that purposeful silence equates to "push[ing] homosexuality on children". And that's something "Real Americans" don't do. Something Surreal Americans do is join the Eagle Forum.

I'm not sure what to make of teachers taking the vow of silence (though I would have loved if they had when I was in school, and left me to read in peace for one day without the hellish distraction of their ceaseless jabber). It is without question a good thing for school administrators to shut up, no matter the reason. I have to think this idea has great appeal to the teenage mind, you get noticed for not saying anything. Which isn't to belittle the courage shutting up on this day for this reason might take in many (make that most) places.

The GLSEN press release on the Day of Silence ends with these statistics which seem about right to me.

GLSEN’s 2001 National School Climate Survey found that 4 out of 5 LGBT students report verbal, sexual or physical harassment at school and 30% report missing at least a day of school in the past month out of fear for their personal safety.


2:03 AM

Tuesday, April 08, 2003
 

Desperate Reporting


Which anchorham has made this war their very own? Agenda Bender's head, heart, and stomach have been most reliably turned by that Foxnews rubberface, Linda Vester. Linda has a look of silent movie hysteria on her face and in her eyes at all times, but she will occasionally add to the effect with seemingly random facial contortions. She brings to mind somewhat the John Water's superstar Mink Stole, except that she lacks the subtlety and understatement that are Mink's hallmark in such films as Mondo Trasho, Mutliple Maniacs, and Female Trouble .

Linda Vester: Fair, unbalanced

4:45 AM

Sunday, April 06, 2003
 

None Taken



Atrios posts:

xgordy informs me that one of CNBCs resident Generals said something like this just now:

'I don't mean any disrespect, but the situation is just like what our gay friends say. Our troops have arrived in downtown Baghdad and shouted, "We're Here, we're Queer, and you're just gonna have to deal with it!"'


This sounds entirely plausible to me. The cable news generals seem to be flying high most of the day, but they hit maximum altitude about 3 in the morning. At 3 in the afternoon they are just unpredictably voluble, at the third chime after midnight it's free association hour in the war room, a strategy slam in front of the electric map. My favorite cavalcade of scrap brass moment came when there was a change of generals right in the middle of a segment. The first general answered some tactical query, and then we cut to the anchorite with some inane subsidiary point and then we cut back to a new ex-general who fielded the question. There'd been a shift change between answer and follow-up. Probably due to some maximum hour work rule negotiated by S.A.G. ( the union of SuperAnnuated Generals.)

1:29 PM