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Agenda Bender
 
Friday, August 12, 2005  

Cursed?


Like all gay men, and most straight women, I sometimes have a penis for a nose, so this hits pretty close to home. Thank you, Louis B. Hobson, Special to the London Free Press (and to me), for insisting on civilized standards in the treatment of characters with cartoon deformities in the films of Rob Schneider:

As in Male Gigolo, the big joke is that these women are oddities. One is a giant who wants him to dress up as a baby. Another is cursed with a penis for a nose. A third has a large hole in her throat and a fourth has enormous ears.

It's one thing for Schneider to ask us to laugh at him, but to laugh at deformities, even if they are absurd, is crass and vulgar
.


10:25 AM

Wednesday, August 10, 2005
 

Europe 2025--Slovenian Brown Bears Rule


First order of business, rename the Euro the Urso:

...brown bears colonise the Alps

They climb trees, can weigh 300 kilos, and are capable of running up to 40mph. And thanks to a reintroduction programme, they are now roaming freely all over the Alps.

The successful comeback of the brown bear, however, is causing consternation in northern Italy, Austria and Switzerland following several grizzly episodes - including the mauling of a prize yak, and the deaths of scores of sheep, goats and chickens.

...Only three brown bears existed in the region of Trentino in northern Italy in 1997. But 10 were captured in Slovenia and transferred to the area as part of a £1 million re-introduction programme, partly funded by the EU.

...While some are warning of dangers, Francesco Borzaga, president of the Trentino branch of the World Wildlife Fund, has been trying to calm fears. "Bears are not considered dangerous to man. Living side by side is possible," he said. "It's a question of reciprocal respect."


9:19 AM

Monday, August 08, 2005
 

Headline Has a Can't-Really-Be-Bothered-to-Try Stank


Which is entirley appropriate:

Passing of Jennings Has End-of-Era Feel


10:04 PM