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The Public Blogging of Pomosexuality, Homotextuality, Homophobiaphilia, and Drear Theory (aka Career Theory) [aka Gay4Pay]. We also read the Corner and OpJournal so the right buttock will be punished as well. All comments subject to publication. Or dismissal. Or Both.


Your Disciplinarians: Glenda Benda (Philapa), Amber Waves (Kansaster), Polly Morpheus (Dreamsville), Tess Tosterone (D'Urbervilles)



WHEN IN PHILLY SHOP AT: Philadelphia AIDS Thrift

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Calvin Klein's Obsession:
Glenn Reynolds
Virginia Postrel
Andrew Sullivan
A & L Daily
Mickey Kaus
Boing Boing
Joanne Jacobs
The Onion
Hunk Hunters
The Corner
Dennis Cooper
Clay Shirky
Wired News
The Cellar IOtD

Paloma Picasso's Tentations:
Eve Tushnet
Ralph Mag
Julian Sanchez
Light of Reason
Matt Welch
Ken Layne
USS Clueless
The Volokhs
Found Mag
Indie Gay Effers
NY Press
L'il G Footballs
Shout Across Pa
SciTech Daily
Manny Toomany
Tim Blair
Jesse Walker
Chas Murtagh
The Loom
Daniel Drezner

Nina Ricci's L'air du Temps:
M. Wickens
N. Imp
J. Micah Marshall
M. S. Dog
H. Stuff Works
M. Pool
W. Peril
E. Dge
M. Filter
C. Cosh
F. Bot
R. Osenbaum
D. Weinberger
G. O'Machine
M. O'Asianboys
B. Leats
E. Schaton
E. Log
D. Enton
T.C. Station
U.W. Beauty (RIP)

Elizabeth Taylor's Black Pearls:

Karl Lagerfeld's Narcisse:
Cranky. P.
Salam P.
Pop B.
Samiz D.
Radley B..
Dan G.
Classical V.
Terry T.
Two B.
Porno C.
Larry L.
Ox B.
Howar D.
Choir E.
Luke F.
Jeff J.
Gay P.
Kieran H.
Roger S.
Jay R.
Jocko H.
Crampe R.

Agenda Bender
Friday, June 06, 2003  

Master Hackster

This site is an offshoot off a photo book that illustrates the physical and fashion similarity of humans who belong to the same sub-culture, scenester similitude I calls it. I performed a flesh hack of the page. It's a little too complicated to explain to tech amateurs and code dabblers such as yourselves, so I'll just give you a couple results.

Brazilian beach boys

Rotterdam muscle dudes

(via BoingBoing)

3:38 PM


What the Corner Has Wrought

As much as Jonah Goldberg, The Corner and the National Review have done to turn America into a gay friendlier place, if I had to pick the single greatest reason the rising generations are calmer about homosexuality and around gay people (and around themselves if they are gay) than are the falling generations, it would have to be MTV. The gay housemates on the various seasons of the Real World have had a tremendous impact. The new gay dude, an 18 year old Irish kid named Simon, looks to be in the great tradition. Attractive, self-confident and cool. I even like that they went softer and a bit more femme this time after the last couple all American beauties (the Chicago and New Orleans gay guys--last season's shows in Vegas were gay free as far as I could tell). It even looks like Simon's doing a little eye makeup, the max factor army needs some representing too. He had a funny line in the first show. He said it was going to be a bigger culture shock living with six Americans than living in Paris. Which is probably why he came off a little stately and remote at times, but his naturalness and affection with the girls was good to see.

But even better than Simon was the production MTV cooked up for Tatu's performance on last night's MTV Movie Awards. All the pop commentators try to sound knowing when they slag Tatu as faux lesbos. Well show biz has been pumping out faux heteros for decades, so if Tatu are pretenders it doesn't begin to equal the score. Though MTV came close to rectifying the imbalance in one night.

The Tatu chix started their number walking down separate aisles till they rejoined each other on stage--hands held, eyes locked. Then down those same aisles came a couple hundred staggeringly hot girls all in matching naughty schoolgirl gear. Skirts barely there, skool ties askew and shirts untucked. So fucking sexy and funny. The Tatu twosome might not be the real thing but one half of the duo had a very real and very big smile on her face as she surveyed the girlflesh.

Oh but that was only the beginning. The schoolgirls in disgrace did some synchronized stripper moves and just in general misbehaved beautifully. They had one more trick up their sleeves though. And that was to take off their sleeves, as well as the shirts attached to them. Then it was oh hell might as well lose skirts too. So now we had a stage full of white pantied and halter T-shirted naughty school girls at the wildest slumber party ever thrown.

The sleepover farewell kisses were many as dawn broke and the song crashed to an end. The stage-side audience was left clutching their souvenir plaid skirts, tailored shirts and ties. Those that weren't clutching themselves anyway. I had to go to work. I left the house in a great mood.

I'm sure the Corner and Jonah G were equally cheered by the spectacle. Their handiwork did so much to make it possible.

4:20 AM

Thursday, June 05, 2003

The Gleam of a Black Body

Just caught up with this Caetano Veloso cd from 1999. So good. Great title too, Livro. Books. Fascinating essay by Veloso in the cd booklet about the influence of Hollywood versus European movies on a kid in the Brazilian boondocks in the 50's. The European stars were equivalent to the Hollywood ones to the kids in Brazil. They were similarly sublime, mysterious and distant gods and goddesses. Hollywood usually gets the glory for shaping the world's pop consciousness, so Veloso's memories here were a revelation to me. He says that Brazilians didn't buy into the Marilyn mystique because they'd already seen the sex goddess thing done more openly and honestly by European actresses. That he didn't appreciate Monroe till Warhol mythologized her. And he mentions that Brazilian kids became expert in the varying standards and formulas of American and European cinema. In American movies the cut happened right at the point that the actors lifted the forks to their mouths to eat. While in European movies (Italian flicks most specifically) the scene only really started when the food was all the way in the mouth.

Veloso's CD notes were excerpted from a book he wrote called Tropical Truth that has now come out in the US. A memoir of the Tropicalia musical movement in Brazil, it is now at the top of my will-read-soon-list. Very soon.

The first verse to the title song, Livro:


You tripped clumsily over the stars
We had almost no books at home
And the city had no bookstore
But the books that entered our lives
Are like the gleam of a black body
Pointing to the expansion of the Universe
Because the phrase, the concept, the plot, the verse
(And, verily, above all, the verse)
Is what can open worlds to the world
-Caetano Veloso

3:57 PM

Wednesday, June 04, 2003

At the Ballet

Noted media dance critic Mickey Kaus needs to pay more attention to his own pirouettes. M.K. promoted the libels against Salam Pax a couple weeks back in a typically cheerful way, and today we find him misremembering the nature of those libels with equal good spirits:

Salam Pax's Guardian column offers what would seem to be a realistic, funny middle-of-the-road assessment of how things are going in Baghdad. ....If he's a CIA agent, he's a CIA agent who is a born columnist.

Hey Mickster, the charge was that Pax was a Baathist stooge, the scion of a family full of suchlike liars and thugs. You should know, you merrily linked the pathetic David Warren column that made the now exploded accusations. Oh yeah, then you linked a reply pointing out the deceptions Warren practiced in his piece (deceptions that were obvious to anyone who'd been paying attention.) Thus playing both sides of the street and staking a claim on the line down the middle too.

Why not pick a curb and finally decide where you stand on the question of Pax's ultimate sympathies? Maybe even apologize for rebroadcasting (and now misrepresenting) the charges against him. And (here's a stretch) how about holding David Warren to the same standards you rightfully expect of the NYT's. Calling on him to correct and apologize for the dishonest column he wrote and you pumped up.

We are big fans of Kausfiles but have to agree with Andrew Sullivan that MK spends a lot of time implying he has an opinion, but never actually saying what it is. You'll never be wrong that way, of course, but you'll often be ridiculous.

2:30 PM

Tuesday, June 03, 2003

So That Agenda Bender Will Be Freely Available to Future Generations

Everybody should sign this petition. It supports a proposal that would get abandoned copyrighted material into the public domain after 50 years via the simple and elegant mechanism of requiring the copyright owners to pay a dollar per work to keep the material under copyright. If they, their heirs, assignees, and surviving good-for-nothing-never-worked-a-day-in-their-lives-and-pretty-much-cut-off-the-sex-towards-the-end-anyway boyfriend/executors don't care enough, or aren't sober enough to pay, then into the public domain it goes.

Copyright tales from the archives.

8:38 PM

Monday, June 02, 2003

My Old Piano Bar

The cats have hijacked the typewriters and are writing the press releases at PETA. Or maybe the female dogs are in charge there now. Miss Diana Ross was a guest supermodel at a fur fashion show and PETA issued this statement:

When we heard that Diana Ross was involved we opted not to protest, as she probably won't even be able to walk a straight line down the runway.

Would PETA show such vicious disrespect to a horse, a goat, a rabbit or a lab rat with a drinking problem? To ask the question is to answer it.

Now, watch the magic. We will rewrite the PETA Press release so that it's actually halfway amusing. The key to improving it? It's been a century at least since "as" was the pivot point of a funny remark. So we will eliminate that first and then remodel the rest:

We were so impressed that Diana Ross would even attempt to walk a straight line down a raised runway that we decided not to protest.

7:54 PM


Kill, Kill and Kill Again! or I Hope You Dance!

I've read about this fisking thing and I think I get the idea now, though for a while I was terribly confused and was having just the awfulest time understanding what it meant. I heard people talking about fisking and fisting and monkeyfishing and mercyfucking, and it all became a jumble of bodyparts, apes, sea-life, exegesis and Christian virtue in my cute but spinning head. I'm sure we all know the feeling. I'm doubly sure Sean Penn does. Sean is a sort of blogger now. He takes out full page ads costing many thousands of dollars in the major papers of our land and says what's on his mind and mentions his kids a lot. Well OK, he's only done it twice so far, but once upon a time I'd only written two entries here. See the pattern?

Sean's got a lot on his mind and his kids certainly sound cute and endearing. I've seen kids eat french fries in exactly the same way he describes his daughter eating them. Makes ya think, doesn't it? Still I have to say Sean lost me when he chose the words of Mr. William (Bill) Saroyan as his credo or something. Mr. Saroyan's words sound nice and all. I mean they would sound nice if I heard someone recite them in a soft and pleasant way, and I didn't know what they meant. If I didn't understand English, that is. I mean if say you translated them into any of the hundreds of languages I don't understand and they were spoken back to me sweetly, I think the effect on the whole would be agreeable--and it wouldn't hurt at all if the one speaking them was cute as a brass button :) and as dumb as a brass monkey ;)

So maybe that's what Sean had in mind. Just the sound of the words and not the sense so much. Cause the meaning is , well, ok let me fist the thing. Oh ha, see? Sorry I mean lemme mercyfish it, I mean monkeyfuck it, oh damn.

In the time of your life, live--so that in that good time there shall be no ugliness or death for yourself or for any life your life touches. hahahaha

Seek goodness everywhere, and when it is found, bring it out of its hiding-place and let it be free and unashamed.

Place in matter and in flesh the least of the values, for these are the things that hold death and must pass away. HAHAHAHA

Discover in all things that which shines and is beyond corruption. HaHaHaHa

Encourage virtue in whatever heart it may have been driven into secrecy and sorrow by the shame and terror of the world.
Hmmmmm, perhaps. oh hell, hahahahahaha

Ignore the obvious, for it is unworthy of the clear eye and the kindly heart. HaHAhaHA

Be the inferior of no man, nor of any man be the superior. hahaHAHA

Remember that every man is a variation of yourself. No man's guilt is not yours, nor is any man's innocence a thing apart. hehehehehehehe

Despise evil and ungodliness, but not men of ungodliness or evil. These, understand. ho ho ho ho ho

Have no shame in being kindly and gentle, but if the time comes in the time of your life to kill, kill and have no regret.
wha? wha ?wha? wha? wha?

In the time of your life,live--so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but shall smile to the infinite delight and mystery of it. :) :) :) :) :)

Can't stop smiling. Maybe he has a point.

12:34 PM

Sunday, June 01, 2003

Truth in Captioning

A picture of an injured tennis player sprawled on the tennis court being comforted by another tennis player whose hand appears to be more or less touching the fallen tennis dude's dick and which might be somewhat titillating if your are especially hard up at the moment.

10:42 PM


The Slipper and the Rose

I thought he came out in Petulia, but ok, I thought everyone came out in Petulia.

10:38 PM


Jayson Blair and Rick Bragg Contributed to This Post

New York Times bylines will soon dwarf the stories themselves:

June 1, 2003
Switzerland, Usually Calm, Erupts in Protest of G-8 Talks

This story was reported by Elaine Sciolino, John Tagliabue, Helene Fouquet and Alison Langley and was written by Ms. Sciolino.

10:17 PM


Who's Driving This Bus?

My new driver's license photo. It was a long day. And a long life. I know no one looks their best in these, and a sequential collection of anyone's lifetime drivers pics is a catalogue of decline and disappointment. Still.....

Agenda Bender, your one stop web source for sophisticated laughs and knowing chuckles.

11:21 AM