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The Public Blogging of Pomosexuality, Homotextuality, Homophobiaphilia, and Drear Theory (aka Career Theory) [aka Gay4Pay]. We also read the Corner and OpJournal so the right buttock will be punished as well.
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(WaPo) A Federal agency's efforts to remove the words "gay," "lesbian," "bisexual" and "transgender" from the program of a federally funded conference on suicide prevention have inspired scores of experts in mental health to flood the agency with angry e-mails.
"It is incredible, the venom from these people," said Mark Weber, a spokesman for the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), the agency within the Department of Health and Human Services that is funding the conference and told presenters they should remove the words from the title of a talk.
"My boss is being called a Nazi," Weber said, referring to SAMHSA Administrator Charles G. Curie, whom President Bush appointed in 2001 to run the $3.2 billion agency.
Hitler's secretary used to complain about the same thing.
Who among us could doubt that Mr. Weber's boss is doing a fine job running SMERSH and spending every crazy dollar of the 3.2 billion before the fiscal year closes. And who wouldn't join me in the noble hope that when SAMHAIN comes up for reappropriation next year some cocksucker on the committee staff loses the paperwork.
At issue is a conference on suicide prevention to be held Feb. 28 in Portland, Ore., and organized by the Suicide Prevention Resource Center of Newton, Mass., a SAMHSA contractor. On the program is a talk that, until recently, was titled "Suicide Prevention Among Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgender Individuals."
It would be a shame if in the aftermath of the accidental defunding of SAMSCLUB, the until recently employed Mr. Weber and Monsieur Curie entertained suicidal thoughts. I mean if they only entertained them.
The Guy Left Standing
The Duchess of Derbyshite was sensibility raped by the cover of a Cosmopolitan magazine recently. Then Cosmo Girl climbed on. Next I jumped in the pile, I forget if I was trying to save the duchess or steal his purse. But while I was there Cosmo Girl invited me to vote in her battle of the boys. Every day two new dudes face off and us cosmo girls pick the hottest one:
At 1 am (ET), the cutie with fewer votes will get knocked out and a new challenger will take his place! At the end of the month, the guy left standing will score Curve Crush skin soother and cologne AND body lotion and Eau De Toilette for the girl who submitted him to the contest!
I now rock the vote daily.
Thursday's contest was no contest, though. San and Vido both have excellently cute names but Vido looks like a Terminator prototype, a Blade Runner extra. But maybe you like that cartoon-jawed, cgi look. So knock yourself out and vote for Buzz Frightyear, it's one girl, one vote. I just don't see any Curve Crush skin soother and cologne AND body lotion in Buzz's near future. San, on the other hand, I see swimming in it. And me with him, crush grooving, body soothing.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
News that Google has switched from Dictionay.com to Answers.com for definition queries has prompted Agenda Bender to do the same. Usually the influence runs the other way, but I'll let the fleas steer the tiger this time.
A ten second tour of Answers.com has proven its superiority in every way but one. Answers' start page threatens fun where Dictionary's promises none. I don't like smiling vocabularybots, but I'll endure the subtle cheer for the sake of Answers' overall excellence. Fact is I always thought Dictionary.com was poorly done. The start page loaded badly and navigation through its affiliated foreign language dictionaries felt very much like a rough voyage to the word's country of origin. Dictionary.com squandered the power of its domain name on an inferior product (see stupid, lazy).
I predict Al Qaeda will stick with Dictionary.com (just read these tea leaves) which should give us an edge in the infowar.
If Tom Wolfe really answered the question, "Do you have an ideal reader in mind when you write?", by saying "Yes, Malcolm Muggeridge", then he owns the question forever. My answer is pretty good too, though.
My readers? Well I imagine them to be:
Moon-faced, starry-eyed Peaches and cream with nuts on the side I never knew there was anyone living like you
Moon-faced, starry-eyed Cooking with gas when I'm by your side I swear my heart's nowhere without you
Of course, Langston Hughes wrote my answer for me, then Kurt Weill tuned it up. And Johnny Mercer's been singing it to me all day. Let's pretend I bought all of you this for Santa Valentines Day.
SANTA MARIA, Calif. (Reuters) - Michael Jackson's lawyer told a court on Monday he planned to call a star-studded list of witnesses to defend the singer against child molestation charges, including basketball's Kobe Bryant, actress Elizabeth Taylor and "Tonight Show" host Jay Leno.
...Meserau's list included the boy who accuses Jackson and members of the youth's family. He also said he would call singers Nick Carter, Stevie Wonder, Barry Gibb and Diana Ross, comedian Chris Tucker, talk show hosts Larry King and Maury Povich and lifestyle guru Deepak Chopra. 3:39 PM
Sunday, February 13, 2005
Feeling Lucky, Biatch?
There is suigoogling, aka auto-ebotic selflinxiation, and then there is suighettogoogling.
I just finished Sweet Pam Tent's book, Midnight at the Palace. It is Pam's memoir of her midnights as one of the few XX ingenues in the Cockettes' cast of mostly XY ingenues. Among her other accomplishments, Pam was a sort of transcontinental human railroad, uniting west coast and east--The New York Dolls and Dan Hicks , The Cockettes and the Ramones, Max's Kansas City and The Stud.
My three favorite quotes from this book about those Stage-Struck (it landed on them), Science-Friscan, Victor/Victorian, Edward/Edwardia, Thrift-Whore, Anarcho-Suckdicalist, Scabfabrous, Gender-Rending, Time-Blending, Bearded-Lady, Glitter Hippies:
"None of us owned an alarm clock..." --Pam Tent's preface to her account of the tribulations of organizing the Cockettes for their flight to NYC where they performed (famously and disastrously) in 1971.
"Eventually the Cockettes will use up the past and the future and have to rely on the present for their material." --Photographer Clay Geerdes
"I feel that the world, for the most part, is shit--with the wars and the banks and the corruption and the lies and the malls. Forget it! Give me a torn dress, a hit of acid, and lets go to the beach. That's a lot--that's everything." --Cockette Reggie, shortly before he died.
The last quote is lifted from the documentary, The Cockettes, which I have consistently managed not to see in the three years since it came out. I must put a stop to this foolish consistency.